Bitch-Back!: Selena’s Out…When Will Miley Be Back In?

Readers are thirsty for the future of Niley and Nelly Fang

By By Ted Casablanca Apr 06, 2010 12:30 PMTags
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Dear Ted:
At first I was skeptical that Nick Jonas and Selena Gomez broke up or even got back together until I took to Nick's Twitter page. He used to follow Selena but not anymore, nowadays when someone stops following someone that usually means two things: (1) the end of a relationship and/or (2) the end of a friendship. I say case closed with the whole Nick and Selena relationship.
—Faye

Dear Twit-Det.:
It's more than safe to say that Nick and Selena's little romance is dunzo. Heart Selena and her total good-girl ways, but she's not the kinda babe the little Jonas needs. Any thoughts who is?

Dear Ted:
I was wondering—if someone writes in with a guess for a BV and you don't print the guess, does that mean the guess was correct?
Ali

Dear Determined:
Sometimes.

Dear Ted:
I'm probably one of the few, but I love Miley Cyrus and Liam Hemsworth together. I think he is a step in the right direction for Miley, and a definite step up from her past boyfriends. Miles and Nick have been over for a while, so why are the Nileyhards going crazy over the fact that she's with Liam? And who do you prefer, Miam or Niley?
Lulu

Dear Young Love:
You're writing to a Niley fan, doll-face, big-time. But that doesn't mean I don't like Liam. That is one effing hot Aussie and I think he and Miles are good together…for now. Nick will be back in the picture. Trust!

Dear Ted:
I've noticed lately that your posts regarding Robsten have decreased exponentially. Are you giving in to the pressure of your non-Twilight readers, or are you getting tired of your boards being filled with 1000+ comments by horny teenagers? I have to admit those girls can be very creative and they are far better investigators than the Hollywood papz...
Anne

Dear Lonesome Twi:
Rob and Kristen have done well at evading the press, maybe we should reward them with a little privacy? Just give it a few more weeks and Eclipse mania will get under way. Let's let 'em be for a bit (only half serious here, babes).

Dear Ted:
I have always loved Mark Wahlberg, has he ever been a Blind Vice? And if so...can't you give me just a little hint on which one? Love ya!
KiKi

Dear Ho-Terage:
Yep, picked up an interesting habit or two from one of his Perfect Storm buds.

Dear Ted:
Stephenie
is posting the Bree "novella" online for free for over a month, because she knows how much we've all spent on her books. She is also giving some of the profit to the Red Cross—so she may not be as money hungry as you keep implying—I'm just saying. But thanks for keeping us posted on all things Twilight!
Hart

Dear Know it All:
Well, you're just taking all the fun out of it aren't ya?

Dear Ted:
Is Nelly Fang Jackson Rathbone, who plays Jasper in Twilight?
—A

Dear Fangalicious:
No, too scrawny.

Dear Ted:
Just wondering if your invite to Jensen Ackles and Danneel Harris' wedding has turned up yet? The big day is only a month away and I'm counting on you and Taryn to share the goss on what really happens behind the scenes... Cheers!
Radha

Dear Mail Demon:
Still waiting on the invite, that gorgeous bitch better not cave!

Dear Ted:
Jennifer Aniston
has a crappy track record when dating celebrity guys so when is she going to wise up and try dating someone who's not famous? Or is she desperate to stay in the limelight at all costs? It's just sad now and bordering on pathetic. Thanks and as always, your blog is still the go-to one for all the juiciest stuff!
Bryn

Dear Matchmaker:
Thanks and totally agree on Jen. Think she should pull a Reese and date an agent-type. But that won't happen.

Dear Ted:
Having met many celebrities, I am confident that you can tell who is genuinely "nice" and who is blowing smoke up your ass. Who are some of the nicest, most down-to-earth celebs you have met?
Tiffany

Dear Dime a Dozen:
Reese, Angie and Jamie Foxx and smokers, Jake, Brad and that other Fox, Megan, are pretty cool. Robsten, too.

Dear Ted:
Do we see Cruella St. Shackles on the big screen or small or both?
Dutch

Dear 101 Guesses:
Big. Very.

Dear Ted:
As you know, recently Anna Paquin has come out as bisexual. Any chance she may be one very vampy B.V.? Star or supporting role? Also, do tell how Moisty Mohr stays so moist. Could it be his side job, or his extracurricular late night outdoor activities? Love ya!
The trip geek

Dear Too Obvs:
Nope, Anna hasn't been a B.V.! Crazy how this Hollywood world works eh?

Dear Ted:
Where is Nikki Reed these days? She seems to be going under the radar with the exception of the contest being held to spend a day with her. All I want to know, Ted, is what happened with Nikki and Kristen Stewart? It seems that Kristen replaced her with Dakota, is Nikki crying over the end of their relationship? She didn't even go to support Kristen's movie The Runaways, which was amazing!
F

Dear Broken Besties:
One day you're in, the next day you're out. Musta been something not so pretty that went down between Nikki and Kristen huh? And yes, Dakota so is the new Nikki.

Dear Ted:
I was talking with some friends the other night about politics and one of them was ribbing me about how George and Laura Bush were still together despite my claims that, according to you, their relationship was in a pretty rocky state. It's been over a year I think since you last reported on their sitch, and I was wondering if you could give us any updates, that way I have something snarky to come back to my friend with.
Meg

Dear Dee-Cee Dish:
I never said they'd break up, I said they'd keep pretty separate lives after the White House, which is exactly what they're doing.

Dear Ted:
I absolutely have to know if Nelly Fang is gay all the way, or bi?
Nic

Dear Hungry for Fangs:
I'd go with bi. But, leaning toward the dudes. Lucky me!

________

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