Morning Piss: Lindsay Lohan's Lost Career
I'm sick of complaining about Jen Aniston's career, since I know she's totally not taking any of my well-meaning advice to heart. Maybe when Marley & Me 5 gets released straight to basic cable she'll think about pursuing some meatier parts, or at least a better haircut than she had in Management.
Here's hoping that's what happens to Lindsay Lohan, another doll in desperate need of a career do-over, once Labor Pains debuts on ABC Family in another month. You can't wait to skip it altogether? Then check out the trailer above.
Yes, that's the same gal who sparkled in megahit Mean Girls five years ago, who lived every actor's dream to work with legendary director Robert Altman before he died and who once had boobs more coveted than ScarJo's rather than a protruding rib cage.
In the blink of a DUI and a couple of chemically powered car chases, LiLo went from A-list star to ditched D-list dame. Hell, even L2's li'l sis has more heat nowadays—Ali totally outlasted Linds in my Most Awful contest! Can ya believe it?
Babe actually talks as if fronting a spray-tanner was her main goal in life! And yet she still yaks on about her Oscar dreams. Sorry, Linds, they don't give Academy Awards for leggings lines. Best you can wish for at this point is another Razzie. Or winning next year's Most Awful Celeb. I'd vote for ya!
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Dish deeper on Twitter @theawfultruth
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