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About New Moon: With all these pots of money the movie is earning, does the cast get to share in the windfall? At the very least will they gets cars or Rolexes or something? And are these kids finally A-listers now?
—Scarlett via the Answer B!tch inbox

As much as you may think that Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart each deserve a brand new shiny Volvo for delivering all that magic over the weekend, as far as I know, they'll just have to settle for millions and millions of dollars.

As for a piece of the action and other perks, well...

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Why are people so up in arms about the comments Miley Cyrus made about not liking Twilight? I'm sure there are plenty more people out there that don't care for it either.
—LeAnn, via Facebook

Miley Cyrus—and fellow Disney pixie Selena Gomez—sure do dislike themselves some Twilight, yes they do. Miley told a radio station this week: "It's a cult. I don't believe in it." And Gomez then confided in Bonnie Hunt that when it comes to the Saga flicks, "I don't watch them."

Which is odd, because just this past June, she was asked about Twilight and said: "It was good. It was really good."

Hmmm.

What people are wondering here is whether Miley, and now Taylor Lautner's punkinhead of an ex, were compelled to say nasty things. Because no teenager is allowed to hate Edward Cullen. It is the Tween Code, and it must never be rent asunder. So, people assume, something sinister must be going on, and by "sinister," people suspect "Disney." Did the Mouse have a hand in this?

Well...

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Do you think the New Moon kids are actually going to have careers after all the Twilight drama dies down? Or be taken seriously?
—Queen of Shoes, via Twitter

Well, because E! Online readers just love reading about how actors are jealous of other actors, or sleeping with other actors, or making little baby actors with other actors, let's do this right.

Let's put this in terms of other actors. Like who among the Twilight stars is really the next Matt Damon, who's the next Drew Barrymore and who's the next Keanu Reeves?

Behold a possible future for each New Mooner...

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Interscope

Lady Gaga's video for "Bad Romance" is either astonishingly brilliant or horrifyingly, beyond-belief stupid. What do you think? Guide your lemmings, Answer Bitch!
—Liz, via Facebook

I think we need to understand what Gaga is trying to tell us other than walk, walk, fashion, baby. And to do that we need to analyze the images we're seeing, and boy are there a lot of 'em.

So what are we working with here? The video includes images of a hairless cat, a guy in an S&M roman gladiator chin strap, an alternate Gaga with anime eyes in a bathtub, and diamonds floating in space. And oh: She's crying, and dancing, but not at the same time.

She wears righteous sunglasses.

There is an actual story to the video, and we'll go over it through the wise, mystical prism of dream analysis! Let us begin...

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INFdaily.com

Why can't Michael Lohan or Jon Gosselin shut up? Is it a disease?
—Lova, via the Answer B!tch inbox

I wish it were, just so I could claim credit for the discovery and make up an awesome name for it, like egobelioma or delusia bifida.

But no. In fact, the reason why Michael Lohan won't stop talking about his daughter—or leaking supposedly private calls about her—and the reason why Jon Gosselin still thinks anyone cares about what he has to say, is a lot more chilling than a mere head disorder...

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What could Levi Johnston possibly gain by posing naked for Playgirl?
—Babs G., via the Answer B!tch inbox

You mean besides money and the eternal high that comes with making Sarah Palin miserable? As the Jews might say, dayenu, that would have been enough.

For women, there are tons of reasons for posing nude: Sharon Stone said she did it for money right after appearing in Total Recall. It sure didn't hurt, given that she later went on to do stuff like Basic Instinct and Casino. We won't even begin to discuss the ongoing successes of The Girls Next Door.

But when it comes to guys who pose in adult mags, there are, generally, only two types: (1) Unknowns who, if the ploy works, graduate to sort-of knowns, and (2) bona fide celebrities who stir up noncontroversies by posing only partly in the buff.

That latter category includes a major country star married to an A-list actress, and a former teen star who has been linked to Megan Fox...

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What's up with Fergie and her hubby? Did he seriously cheat on her with a stripper?
—Lauren J., via Facebook

Well, let's see, we have the stripper, named Nicole Forrester, alleging yes; and Josh Duhamel denying it; and Forrester coming back with a lie detector test that she allegedly passed. So, ladies and gentlemen of the Internets, I ask you: Do you accept the lie detector test into evidence?

Now, if you're shocked, just shocked, that an actor would get busy with a stripper, you don't know actors. Or musicians. Or sports stars. Or anybody. Because everybody in entertainment loves a good exotic dancer, and I have evidence to prove it, along with a blind item or two...

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So what was the most interesting or weirdest answer you heard at your New Moon press junket?
—MDuncan, via Twitter

You mean I have to pick just one? On Friday I sat through an entire afternoon of Cullens, Volturi and Wolf Pack members, not to mention at least one guy with an English accent, leather jacket and stand-up hair.

I think any answer about weird/interesting things said there deserves a Top Five list. At least.

Here goes:

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